Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize