I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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