Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Randomize
