sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Randomize
