i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
