you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
