I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
you win again, gameday.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
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