he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
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