Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
