I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
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