It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
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