these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
