when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
