oh god the rape fog is back!
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
