Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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