I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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