We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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