it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Randomize
