I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
