Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Randomize
