You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
