I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
what day is it and did you see me today?
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
