Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize