I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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