It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
The ass gains better be worth it
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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