These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
