tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
