i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
