Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Randomize
