whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I'm drive I can fine osifer
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
