The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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