if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Randomize
