I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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