people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
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