i just google imaged poop.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Randomize
