Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
