If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
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