This girl is more easily done than said...
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Can vaginas get frostbite?
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
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