Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.�
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Randomize
