So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
