Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize