I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Randomize
