I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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