My friends, they love my intelligence
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Randomize
