Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize
