We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
How naked do you want me to be?
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
