I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Randomize
