Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
