Soap is not a condiment
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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