Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
